I started out this post by throwing a lil' pity party. I shall not. I really don't want this blog to become a dumping ground for negative thoughts.
Let's focus today on 10 - yes, 10 - things I'm thankful for today. I literally just pulled that number out of nowhere.
1. My hair looks nice today.
2. God woke me up this morning with energy to start my day. No dragging of the feet necessary.
3. I had a beautiful, yummy bowl of spicy spaghetti for lunch that my husband made last night.
4. I have a husband who adores me and goes out of his way to make me laugh.
5. I have a great job where I'm well-regarded and well-compensated.
6. My three children are healthy and living and God is watching and protecting them.
7. I should mention I'm struggling here...umm...oh yeah! I have all 10 fingers and toes, two arms and legs that still work.
8. I still love to laugh and it's pretty easy for me to do so.
9. My mom's spirits are high in spite of all of the health problems she faces and the surgeries to come.
10. I have a nice car to drive and a very well air-conditioned roof over my head hallelujah Jesus!
Hey, that wasn't so bad. I know I could think of even more things to be thankful for if I spent a little more time. Like, I'm doing this devotional in the Bible app called Starting Over: Your Life Beyond Regrets because, um, I have allowed regret to make me feel a certain way over the years and I want to stop. Anyway, I recently learned the difference between spiritual and unspiritual regret. Like, there's the regret where you beat yourself up on a regular basis - ahem, throw pity parties - but still don't do anything differently. Then there's the regret where you learn from the mistake(s) you made and recognize that you can do better - and you work toward doing just that! The difference between those two is massive. One is surely an attack from the enemy and one is from the Holy Spirit, Who wants to guide you toward a better version of yourself.
Ok, for example, let's say you regret yelling at or cursing someone out. Godly regret will lead you to 1. Apologize to the person you yelled at, and 2. Do your best not to ever talk to anyone like that again. Ungodly regret will cause you to rehearse that thing over and over in your head and feel terrible about it - but also feel too prideful to apologize. Furthermore, the guilt and shame that continues to plague you festers in your spirit until it's even easier and easier for you to continue treating people that way because, as you well know, hurt people hurt people!
If I think about it, what sense does it make for me to have shame and regret about something I did years ago that I can't go back in time and undo, and for which I've apologized to the hurt parties, and for which I've received forgiveness from God Himself? My God wouldn't continue to bring something to my mind to make me feel bad about myself, especially not something I have absolutely no power to erase. All I CAN do is move forward and do better.
So that's the 11th thing I'm grateful for: that devotional in the Bible App. It's helping me to see regret in a very different way, and I needed that!!!
Until next time, Stay Blessed!
XOXOXO - Jess
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